1 Corinthians 7: Marriage Therapy, Yikes!

Have you ever had a friend that was a lot of fun in small doses? You could only stand them for a little while before they became hard to deal with? This is what I think about when I think of Corinth. They were in a large international metropolis filled with people from various backgrounds. It was likely a fun place to be for a visit. However, living there was probably a different story. Paul is in Ephesus when he receives word that the church in Corinth is at it again. Divisions and quarreling are breaking out everywhere over wild things... trust me... wild things. They are a church in division. Paul has a frank discussion with them on the need for harmony among the various people groups, the need to rally around the essentials, how to conduct proper worship services without hurting each other, and so much more. The real-life soap-opera needs someone to make sense of it all.

Let’s read it together.

Contact us-

Ask a Question
Send Encouragement

Take a Next Step-

SOAP Bible Study Method.
Bible Reading Plan.
Free Weekly Newsletter.

Socials-

Facebook.
Instagram.
X.
YouTube.

The More We Dig. The More We Find.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome to Bible Breakdown
• 2:27 Paul's Marriage Therapy Session Begins
• 5:15 Sexual Relations in Marriage
• 8:40 Guidance on Mixed-Faith Marriages
• 12:15 Balancing Marriage and Faith
• 18:14 Closing Prayer and Reflection

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

Hey everyone and welcome to the Bible Breakdown podcast. In this podcast, we will be breaking down the Bible one chapter a day. Whether you are a new believer or have been following Christ for a while, we believe that you will learn something new and fresh every single day. So thank you for joining us and let's get into breaking down the Bible together.

Speaker 2: 0:23

Well, hello everybody, welcome back to the Bible Breakdown Podcast with your host, pastor Brandon. Today, 1 Corinthians 7, and we're going to call this one marriage therapy. Yikes, paul is being Daddy Paul for these guys and he is going to get into it. It's almost like he's saying, all right, kids, let me lay it out for you, and he's going to get real like a daddy should. We're going to get to that in just a moment. But, as always, if you like what we're doing here, make sure you like, share and subscribe to the podcast and the YouTube channel. Leave us a five-star review if you're listening to the podcast you are still my favorites every day, and also go to the Rally Point Bible Breakdown Discussion and I'd love for you to not only just read those but share those on your Facebook profiles Let everybody else see what we're doing. We're almost up to 200 people in that group and it's just an honor, and the more we dig, the more we find, and I love rallying around God's Word.

Speaker 2: 1:12

Well, if you want to get out your Bibles to 1 Corinthians 7, can I tell you I have the honor of walking with people through getting married and one of my favorite slash, not favorite things. I've been doing this long enough now that I don't get as uncomfortable as I used to. But in one of our pre-marriage sessions I actually will bring up the subject of marriage and sex. And you know, it's amazing how people seem like they can watch movies now with sexual content. It doesn't bother them. We see it all over social media and everywhere else. But when a pastor says the word sex, man, it gets very uncomfortable in the room. And it's not just because I'm uncomfortable saying it.

Speaker 2: 1:53

Well, as we've been talking about in this, you know Paul, he is writing to the church of Corinth because man the theme of it is a divided church is trying to find harmony. So it's almost like he's invited them into his office and he said, listen, we're going to have a group therapy session and we're going to figure out some of this division going on. And so we spent the first maybe three chapters, maybe four chapters, talking to them about the need for rallying around God. And he said, listen, you've called me your spiritual father, so that's what I'm going to be, so I'm going to go into daddy mode. Well, the past three chapters, that's what he's been doing. Chapter five, he's like got his hand on his hips and you've been hanging out with who you know. Yesterday he was talking about the idea of being divisive of one another and not giving into sexual sin. Well, today he's going to say and another thing, let me talk about your marriages. And he's going to say the S word a lot. So we're going to jump into this. It's going to be uncomfortable, but just for me you'll have a good time. So imagine that Paul's looking at a group of folks and he just lays into the local marriage situation. If you're ready, let's jump in Pray for your pastor.

Speaker 2: 2:57

All right, number one our first Corinthians, chapter seven, verse one, says now, regarding the questions you asked in your letter, pause real quick. Now, that's most likely what happened. Paul wrote to them. They wrote back asking for clarification. Now Paul is answering their questions with this. This is the correspondence on how it worked. One of the questions must have been about the sex. So here we go. You asked the questions in your last letter.

Speaker 2: 3:21

Yes, it is good to abstain from sexual relations, but because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman should have her own husband. In other words, don't be shacking up. Getest thouest, marriedest, verse 3. The husband should fulfill his wife's sexual needs and the wife should fulfill her husband's needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband and the husband gives authority over her body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward you should come together again so that Satan would not be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command, but I wish everyone were single just as I am. Yet each person has a gift from God, one kind Pause.

Speaker 2: 4:30

Now what Paul is saying is is he's single? Now, a lot of historians, and different ones, think that actually Paul might have been married and his wife either left him due to the ministry or she died. I tend toward the fact that she might have died early on because of the type of person Paul was, as a Pharisee, he would have had to be married, all that kind of stuff. So let's just say, for the sake of argument, paul had been married and now he's single. And so Paul is saying here, and the Holy Spirit was sure to make sure.

Speaker 2: 4:58

Paul said I'm telling you it would be better off if you could be single, but that's not for most people. So what he's saying is is, in the marriage situation, everyone's got sexual needs and urges, and that's just. That's just natural. But the problem becomes is when you withhold sex as a form of punishment or as a form of manipulation, or if you indulge in sex as a form of manipulation or as a form of punishment. So instead you should serve your spouse by understanding they have needs and then fulfilling those needs, so as to not give the enemy an opportunity to cause division or to tempt them in other ways. Now, there obviously are nuances there and there should be agreements there, but God's word is simple in that that is a ministry you can give to your spouse within the context of proper boundaries.

Speaker 2: 5:47

Okay, move on quickly, verse 8. So I say this to those who aren't married and to widows it is better to stay unmarried, just as I am, but if you can't control yourself, you should go ahead and get married. It is better to marry than to burn with lust. That is very, very true. But for those who are married, I have a command that comes not from me but from the Lord. So, in other words, he's saying before this, he said this is my opinion. Okay, I'm just telling you, this is my opinion. This is what the Lord says.

Speaker 2: 6:14

A wife must not leave her husband. But if she does leave him, let her remain single, or else be reconciled to him and her husband must not leave his wife, or else be reconciled to him and her husband must not leave his wife. I now speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a fellow believer has a wife who is not a believer and she's willing to continue living with him, he must not leave her. But if a believing woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him, and I'll explain all this in a minute. But if the husband or wife who isn't a believer insists on leaving, let them go, and in such cases, the believing husband or wife is no longer bound to the other. For God has called you to live in peace. Don't you wives realize that your husbands might be saved because of you, and don't you husbands realize that your wives might be saved because of you? So Praise the Lord, and, and the man who was uncircumcised when he became a believer should not be circumcised now. Praise the Lord, for it makes no difference whether or not a man has been circumcised.

Speaker 2: 7:51

The important thing is to keep God's commands. Now, that helps explain what happened before. According to some of the different history and different things, when people would get saved, they would go Well, now I'm saved. Now my spouse isn't saved, so what I'm going to do is I'm going to leave them and I'm going to go and get married. There's also a way for them to try to get out of an unhappy marriage. Well, I'm saved. Now they're not. So I'm going to go. And he said no, no, no, don't do that.

Speaker 2: 8:22

If you leave them and then they go not know that you being married and following Christ might be an example to them, might be an example to your kids. So, if you can do that, stay married Now. Obviously Paul's not talking about a situation where you're being beat up or whatever. He's saying in a situation where one of y'all is saved, one of y'all isn't. You're not allowed to just go leave. You have to try to stay Now. You're not allowed to just go leave. You have to try to stay Now. If they leave you, then fine, but you have to try to stay. That's what Paul's trying to say.

Speaker 2: 8:49

Whatever state you were in when you gave your life to Christ, that's the state you should try to remain in, all right. Verse 20. Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you. Are you a slave? Don't let that worry you. But if you get a chance to be free, take it and remember if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord. And if you were free when the Lord called you and now you're a slave in Christ, god paid for you with a high price. So don't be enslaved by the world. Each of you, dear brothers and sisters, should remain as you were when God first called you.

Speaker 2: 9:22

Now, regarding your question about the young women who are not yet married, I do not have a command for you from the Lord, for them, but the Lord, in his mercy, has given me wisdom that can be trusted, so I will share it with you. Because of the present crisis, I think it is best to remain as you are. If you have a wife, do not seek to end the marriage. If you do not have a wife, do not seek to get married. But if you do get married, this is not a sin. And if your woman gets married, it is not a sin. However, those who get married at this time have troubles, and I'm trying to spare you those problems. Pause Now.

Speaker 2: 9:56

There's two things going on in this situation. You have number one, that they were in such a readiness for the second coming of Christ that they were concerned about getting married, as if somehow, that would kind of mess that up. And what Paul is saying is you're right, we should always live in a readiness for the second coming of Christ. However, if you want to get married, go ahead. And then also, you have the increasing pressure of being a Christian in the community. And he's saying, yes, we're starting to experience more pressure and more suffering and things like that. So if you don't want to get married, that's great. If you do, go ahead and get married. In other words, what Paul is saying is occupy until Christ comes.

Speaker 2: 10:35

That's still a good lesson for people today. We should be in readiness for the coming of Christ, but always live as though he's not going to come in our lifetime, because we really don't know. And so we live with one eye on the sky Verse 29. But let me say this, dear brothers and sisters the time that remains is very short. So from now on, those with wives should not focus only on their marriage. Those who weep or who rejoice or who buy things should not be absorbed by their weeping or their joy or their possessions, but use those things as the world should, so the world should not become attached to them. Those who use the things of the world should not become attached to them, for this world, as we know it, will soon pass away. That was the readiness that they live with of knowing that God is more important than all these things. All right, verse 32,.

Speaker 2: 11:20

I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the things of the Lord and then thinking about how to please him. But a married man has to think about the things of his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided and in the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has been married or has never been married can devote herself to the Lord and wholly in her body and in spirit. But a man or a woman, but a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. I'm saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible.

Speaker 2: 12:00

But if a man thinks that he is treating his fiancee irresponsibly and improperly, it will inevitably give into his passions. Let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. But if he has decided firmly not to marry and there is no urgency and he can control his passions, then he does well not to marry as well. So the person who marries his fiancée does well and the person who does not marry does even better. A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. But my opinion on it would be it'd be better for her to stay single. And I think I'm giving you wise counsel, giving you counsel from God's spirit, when I say this.

Speaker 2: 12:43

So there's a lot going on in this and the basic idea all the way back to this is is to get God involved with the important, most important relationship you're going to have outside of your relationship with God. God is the number one most important relationship you're ever going to have. Then you have to bring God into that relationship. If you do that, you have to make sure that you keep God as the central focus. If you keep God as the central focus, then you're going to be able to do well when it comes to their sexual relations question. If you're helping one another to stay pure before God because your focus is on God, then you're doing well.

Speaker 2: 13:26

If you're single and your focus is on God and you are okay with being single, then be single. That's what Paul is saying. But then if you can't control yourself or you have a desire to have a family, have that stuff then, because of your desire for God, get married, just everything you do. Make sure that your focus is on God, and one of the things I've told people before and I've learned this in my own life you want to have a great spouse. You encourage them to put God at the very center of their life, because as they follow God, god will then cause them to love you more.

Speaker 2: 13:55

And if you are in a situation where you're dating someone, make God that first priority and God will either lead them toward you or lead them away from you, and that's the best thing for you. But when you get into this relationship dynamic, when you make God the center, he'll always lead you in the right direction. There's a lot of nuances to this, and so I'm encouraging you to dig deeper in this. And then let's talk about it on the Bible breakdown discussion, because there's so many things in here and there's scriptures here where Paul is talking about specifics that then we've taken and we've created bondage with this, and you notice how Paul, over and over again, is saying I'm not saying these things to restrict you, I'm saying these things to help you and to give you life.

Speaker 2: 14:32

So I want us to continue that discussion there, but for now let's pray, father. Let's pray, father, thank you so much for your goodness, your kindness, your faithfulness. Thank you, god, that in the relationship of marriage there's so many nuances, so many pieces, and we all bring different things. But, lord, my hope is that as we make you the center of this relationship, lord, you'll help us find that center, help us find that balance. God, I pray for everybody right now who's not married but wants to be. Lord, that you will give them the patience to trust you, lord.

Speaker 2: 15:01

For those who are married but don't want to be, I pray you will help them, lord, to not ever give up and to make you the focus of their relationship. Lord, I'm thankful that you're going to speak to us the way we need to hear you speak. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen Well. Family session therapy session over for today for the Corinthian Church. Amen Well, family session therapy session over for today for the Corinthian church. And in 1 Corinthians 10, 31 tells us what to do, and that is whatever you do, eating or drinking do all for the glory of God no-transcript.