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The Bible Breakdown
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The Bible Breakdown
Job 18: The Best Way to Be Unhelpful
How often do our well-intentioned words fall flat or even wound those we aim to support? In this episode, we dissect the harsh rebuke of Bildad the Shuhite in Job 18, illustrating the pitfalls of offering unhelpful encouragement during someone's suffering. We examine how Bildad’s attempts to prove his point exacerbate Job's misery and offer a powerful lesson on the importance of empathy and understanding. Through the lens of this Biblical interaction, we highlight the dangers of prioritizing argument over compassionate support, and the common struggle to truly be there for our loved ones in their time of need.
Join us as we navigate the delicate balance between tough love and genuine care, inspired by the wisdom of Henry Nouwen and the teachings of Jesus. This episode encourages a deep self-reflection on our motives when attempting to help, urging us to seek divine guidance and a heart full of empathy. We also emphasize the importance of open communication and forgiveness from those who are suffering, recognizing that even good intentions can sometimes lead to pain. Ending with a heartfelt prayer for unity and healing, we remind ourselves and our listeners of the enduring power of faith and the necessity of trusting in God's plan through all circumstances.
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The More You Dig. The More You Find.
Well, everybody, welcome back to the Bible Breakdown podcast with your host, pastor Brandon. Today, job, chapter 18, and today's title is the Best Way to Be Unhelpful. The Best Way to Be Unhelpful, what we're going to see today is there's the guy Bildad who is going to kind of chime in again and he is going to do what? If you've ever tried to help somebody, I think we've all been caught in this moment where you're you're trying to be encouraging to someone, but they're, they're being a little nasty. You know they're. They're they're being in their feelings a little bit, they're upset and if you're not careful, you find yourself getting into your feelings and now, instead of helping them, you're trying to prove your point. That's shockingly. That doesn't go well right For anybody, and we're going to see how, you know, old Bill, old Billy, the dad, runs into this and see if maybe the Lord would teach us a better way. So, before we do into that, before we go into that, rather, if you like what we're doing here, make sure you're you like, share and subscribe to the YouTube channel and the podcast. Make sure you are leaving us a five-star review on the podcast. Make sure you're leaving us comments on the YouTube channel and make sure you are going to the Bible Breakdown Discussion on Facebook.
Speaker 0:There's an amazing team of people that are doing devotions there every day and it is wonderful to see what they do. I look forward to getting on there every day and seeing those posts and I hope you enjoy it as well. And the more we dig, the more we find, and it is an honor to have you with us as we go through God's Word together. I love it. I feel like I'm your friendly neighborhood tour guide. You know, going through the Bible with you and discovering some of this stuff fresh and new. You know some of this, you know, I learn fresh when I'm studying for this and I can't wait to share it with you, and that's one of the things I love about the book of Job. So if you have the book of Job and you want to open it up with me or your Bible, open it up with me to Job 18,.
Speaker 0:Remember that the overall goal of Job is trusting God's wisdom and suffering, and that's one of the things that I love about this book, because so many people avoid Job. It's just sad, it's difficult, but I don't know about you. If there's one thing I found in common with everybody is we've all been through some form of unpleasantness, some form of suffering in our life. And the other thing I've noticed that most of us have is many times when we go through suffering, go through difficulty, we don't know how to tell other people what we're going through properly. A lot of times it just comes out, and it comes out as anger or crying or frustration. But on the other side most people I know it's very difficult for us to feel like we're truly helping somebody who's going through those things, and so it just gets difficult all the way around. And so the book of Job is amazing because it's a case study on this innocent man who's going through a difficult time and his friends are being horrible, and I think we can all relate to that at one point or another. And so we're seeing how we can do better, how we can help one another, take next steps, and what we're going to see today in Job 18 is old Billy the dad.
Speaker 0:Bill dad, the shoe height he is now. He's just mad, you know, job, has he? He's criticized them, let's be honest. He's told them you guys really stink at this encouragement stuff. And now it's no longer about the fact that Job is suffering. Now it's about proving a point. And have you ever been there, ever been in that place where you truly were trying to help? If I can just get you to see my point of view, you'll get it, only to realize that it just turns into an argument. Well, what do you do when that happens? Let's read this together and see if the Lord will kind of reveal to us maybe a better way by the time we get to the end. So here it goes, mr Billy Dad. The Shuhite replied. Here we go. How long before you stop talking? Speak sense, if you want us to answer. Do you think we are mere animals? Do you think we are stupid? You may tear out Tremble pause. Now remember who Bill Dad is talking to. He's talking to poor Job, who has lost everything, and now he's just straight up being mean because he's now angry too. You ever been there? Right Verse five.
Speaker 0:Surely the light of the wicked will be snuffed out. The sparks of their fire will not glow, the light in their tent will grow dark and the lamp hanging above them will be quenched. The confident stride of the wicked will be shortened and their own schemes will be their downfall. The wicked will walk into a net and they fall into a pit. A trap grabs them by the heel and a snare holds them tight. The noose lies hidden on the ground and a rope is stretched across their path. Terrors surround the wicked and trouble them at every step. Hunger depletes their strength and calamity waits for them to stumble. Disease eats their skin and death devours their limbs. They are torn from the security of their own homes and they are brought down to the king of terrors. The homes of the wicked will burn down, burning sulfur rains on their houses, their roots will dry up and their branches will wither. All memory of their existence will fade from the earth. No one will remember their names and they will be thrust from light into darkness, driven from the world. They will have neither children, nor grandchildren, nor any survivors in the place where they lived. People in the West are appalled at their fate. People in the East are horrified. They will say this is the home of the wicked person, the place of one who rejected God.
Speaker 0:So what in the world is he just saying? Well, he's just saying, job, we get it. We get that all these evil people are doing bad things. How long before you're going to stop talking about it. How long are you just going to get over it? Well, that's extremely the best way to be unhelpful, because, once again, remember Job is trying to open the door and let them see guys, I'm struggling, I'm hurting, I'm having a bad day and I really need help. I feel like everything is going wrong. And Bildad's response is Job, you've been telling us things are going wrong. Yeah, bad things happen to good people. Get over it. Well, that's a really great way to be unhelpful, and he's doing that because Job is not responding to what they, in a way, they want him to.
Speaker 0:Well, have you ever been there? You ever been in a situation where you're on one side of the other, you've got two groups of people or more, but you've got the one who's struggling and you got the one who's trying to help. Well, the one who is struggling is talking about their struggle, and then the one who's trying to help is just making a mess of it. They're trying, but it's just not working and all it's doing is agitating the one who's struggling. So the one who's struggling gets angry and now it's just a fight and it's no longer about helping anybody and it just becomes a mess, doesn't it.
Speaker 0:Well, if you want to be unhelpful and you're the one who is trying to help, if you want to be unhelpful and you're the one who is trying to help, if you want to be unhelpful, tell them to get over it. Tell them to stop talking stop speaking just nonsense and get over it. Can I tell you there is a time when you have to tell somebody to just get tough, rub some dirt in it and move forward. There's a time for that. But there's also a time when to sit with them and let them mourn and let them weep. Now, it's not always objective. There are different times of mourning or for different situations and seasons, but that's why you have to be a friend, why you have to be close and why you have to be in the moment to really understand when it's time to tell them to get over it and when it's time to just sit with them. And so let's look at this both ways and let's kind of get some wisdom from the Lord On one side.
Speaker 0:If you're the one who's struggling, can I tell you that those around you who are trying to help you, we're trying, but we don't know what's going on in your heart. A great author, henry Nouwen once said no one truly knows the brokenness of another. We can be really close, but only Jesus truly knows, and so if you're suffering and you have people in your life who are doing more harm than good, can I tell you on their behalf? I'm sorry. We're trying to help, but we're not always so good at it. So I ask you on their behalf, please forgive us and, instead of getting angry with us, try one more time not to take it personal and to share with us what's going on in your heart On the other side.
Speaker 0:If you know someone who's going through a hard time, can I tell you, before reaching for the get over it, ask yourself why do you want them to get over it? Are you wanting them to get over it because they're being mean and they're being hateful and it's just? You know you're ready for them to just get past this and things get back to normal. Or are you wanting them to get over it because you see the pain they're going through and you don't want them to be in pain anymore? That can really help. You know what next step there is to take, and so I want to encourage you.
Speaker 0:If you're the one trying to help, remember that the hurting person, they don't mean it, they're just raw with emotion. And so, before telling them to get over it, question your own motives, take it to the Lord and let the Lord give you wisdom on how to do it. It's really difficult. Relationships are so difficult and they're very different, because we're all very different, and so you have to walk with the Lord hand in hand as you walk with someone through suffering. And if you're the one going through the suffering today, my prayer for you is is that God will give you wisdom to see beyond what people say and see their heart and their intentions. Let's pray together right now, god, thank you so much for today. Thank you, god, that you're with us, because we can make a mess of things. It's so easy for us to mean well but do wrong.
Speaker 0:I pray, lord, for anyone today who they're hurting. Because they're hurting and someone reached out to them in a bad way. Lord, I pray you will heal their heart or that you will help them to realize, god, that maybe they had good intentions, maybe they had bad intentions, but no matter what, you are the one who brings healing, god. I pray for others, lord, who are trying to help someone who's hurting, but, lord, they've been hurt in the process because, as that person has been trying to figure out their own way forward, they've hurt them. I pray, lord, that you'll bring healing to us all so that we can walk forward together. Lord, you'll bring healing in all things. In Jesus' name, we pray, amen, amen.
Speaker 0:Well, god's word says in Job, chapter 1, verse 21,. I came naked from my mother's womb. I will be naked when I leave. The Lord gave me what I had and the Lord has taken it away. But praise the name of the Lord. That's Job's way of saying. It all comes from him. I trust him with it all. I pray that that's your prayer today as well. I love you. I'll see you tomorrow. For Job, chapter 19.
