1 Corinthians 07 Round Two: Marriage Therapy, Yikes!

Ever felt the room tense when a pastor says the word sex? We went there with 1 Corinthians 7—and found honesty that heals. Paul speaks directly to spouses, singles, and those in mixed-faith marriages with a posture that’s both clear and compassionate: keep God first, treat intimacy as mutual service, and let your relationship status serve your mission, not define it.

We unpack how mutual authority in marriage dignifies both husband and wife, why withholding or weaponizing intimacy erodes trust, and how prayerful agreements protect hearts from temptation. For singles, we explore Paul’s high view of undivided devotion, the freedom to serve without distraction, and the wisdom to marry when desire and calling align. No shame, no superiority—just a grounded vision where marriage and singleness are both holy paths to love God and neighbor well.

We also face the delicate terrain of mixed-belief homes. When an unbelieving spouse stays, peace and patient witness can sanctify the household’s atmosphere; when they go, believers are called to live in peace rather than captivity to conflict. Threaded through it all is Paul’s sober view of time: the world’s form is passing, so hold roles, possessions, and plans lightly while clinging to God tightly. That lens transforms hot-button topics into practical steps—serve one another, seek peace, and choose covenant over chaos.

If you’re navigating desire, vows, or vocation, this conversation offers sturdy guardrails and surprising grace. Tap play, then join our community conversation to dig deeper. If this helped you, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review to help others find the Bible Breakdown. What part challenged you most today?

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The More We Dig. The More We Find.

Scripture quotations taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation (NLT).
Copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation.
Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome And Setup
• 0:37 Community Updates And Call To Share
• 1:04 Why Paul Writes To A Divided Church
• 2:47 Sex, Marriage, And Mutual Service
• 5:25 Staying Or Leaving In Mixed-Faith Marriages
• 7:43 Remain As You Were When Called
• 9:10 Singleness, Marriage, And Present Pressures
• 11:08 Undivided Devotion And Wise Counsel
• 13:03 Keep God Central In Every Season
• 14:26 Prayer And Closing Encouragement

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Welcome to the Bible Breakdown Podcast. Every day, we take one chapter of the Bible, dig deeper, and discover that the more we dig, the more we find. You can find out more at the BibleBreakdown.com. Now let's grow in God's Word together. Well, hello, everybody. Welcome back to the Bible Breakdown Podcast with your host, Pastor Brandon. Today, 1 Corinthians 7, and we're going to call this one marriage therapy. Yikes. Paul is being daddy Paul up for these guys, and he is going to get into it. It's almost like he's saying, All right, kids, let me lay it out for you. And he's going to get real like a daddy should. We're going to get to that in just a moment. But as always, if you like what we're doing here, make sure you like, share, and subscribe to the podcast and the YouTube channel. Leave us a five-star review if you're listening to the podcast. You are still my favorites every day. And also go to the rally point Bible breakdown discussion. And I'd love for you to not only just read those, but share those on your Facebook profiles. Let everybody else see what we're doing. We're almost up to 200 people in that group. And it's just an honor. And the more we dig, the more we find. And I love rallying around God's word. Well, if you want to get out your Bibles to 1 Corinthians chapter 7, can I tell you, I have the honor of walking with people through getting married? And one of my favorite slash not favorite things, I've been doing this long enough now that I don't get as uncomfortable as I used to. But in one of our pre-marriage sessions, I actually will bring up the subject of marriage and sex. And you know, it's amazing how people, it seems like they can watch movies now with sexual content. It doesn't bother them. We see it all over social media and everywhere else. But when a pastor says the word sex, man, it gets very uncomfortable in the room. And it's not just because I'm uncomfortable saying it. Well, as we've been talking about in this, you know, Paul, he is writing to the church at Corinth because, man, this the theme of it is a divided church is trying to find harmony. So it's almost like he's invited them into his office and he said, listen, we're going to have a group therapy session and we're going to figure out some of this division going on. And so we spent the first maybe three chapters, maybe four chapters, talking to them about the need for rallying around God. And he's saying, Listen, you've called me your spiritual father, so that's what I'm going to be. So I'm going to go into daddy mode. Well, the past three chapters, that's what he's been doing. Chapter five, he's like got his hand on his hip saying, You've been hanging out with who? You know, yesterday he was talking about uh the idea of being divisive of one another and not giving into sexual sin. Well, today he's gonna say, and another thing, let me talk about your marriages. And he's gonna say the S word a lot. So we're gonna jump into this. It's gonna be uncomfortable, but just for me, you'll have a good time. So imagine that Paul's looking at a group of folks and he just lays in to the local marriage situation. If you're ready, let's jump in. Pray for your pastor. All right, number one, or 1 Corinthians chapter 7, verse 1 says, Now, regarding the questions you asked in your letter, pause real quick. Now, that's most likely what happened. Paul wrote to them. They wrote back asking for clarification. Now, Paul is answering their questions with this. This is the correspondence and how it worked. One of the questions must have been about the sex. So here we go. You asked the questions in your last letter. Yes, it is good to abstain from sexual relations, but because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband. In other words, don't be shacking up. Gettest thouest marriedest. Verse three the husband should should oh the husband should fulfill his wife's sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband's needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over her body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time, so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan would not be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command, but I wish everyone were single just as I am. Yet each person has a gift from God, one kind or another. Pause. Now, what Paul is saying is he's single. Now, a lot of historians and different ones think that actually Paul might have been married and his wife either left him due to the ministry or she died. I tend toward the fact that she might have died early on because of the type of person Paul was, as a Pharisee, he would have had to be married, all that kind of stuff. So let's just say for the sake of argument, Paul had been married and now he's single. And so Paul is saying here, and and the Holy Spirit was sure to make sure Paul said, I'm telling you, it would be better off if you could be single, but that's not for most people. So what he's saying is, is in the marriage situation, everyone's got sexual needs and urges, and that's just that's just natural. But the problem becomes is when you withhold sex as a form of punishment or as a form of manipulation. Or if you indulge in sex as a form of manipulation or as a form of punishment. So instead, you should serve your spouse by understanding they have needs and then fulfilling those needs so as to not give the enemy an opportunity to cause division or to tempt them in other ways. Now, there are obviously nuances there and there should be agreements there, but the God's word is simple in that that is a ministry you can give to your spouse within the context of proper boundaries. Okay, move on quickly. Verse 8. So I say this to those who aren't married and to widows. It is better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if you can't control yourself, you should go ahead and get married. It is better to marry than to burn with lust. That is very, very true. But for those who are married, I have a command that comes not from me, but from the Lord. So, in other words, he's saying before this, he said, This is my opinion. Okay, I'm just telling you it's my opinion. This is what the Lord says. A wife must not leave her husband, but if she does leave him, let her remain single or else be reconciled to him, and her husband must not leave his wife. I now speak to the rest of you, though I do not have a direct command from the Lord. If a fellow believer has a wife who is not a believer, she will be and she's willing to continue living with him, she must not leave her, or he must not leave her. But if a believing woman has a husband who is not a believer, and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. For the believing wife belongs, brings holiness to their marriage, and the believing husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. And I'll explain all this in a minute. But if the husband or wife who isn't a believer insists on leaving, let them go. And in such cases, the believing husband or wife is no longer bound to the other, for God has called you to live in peace. Don't you wives realize that your husbands might be saved because of you? And don't you husbands realize that your wives might be saved because of you? So each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed in you or placed you and remain as you were when God first called you. This is my rule for all the churches. For instance, a man who was circumcised before he became a believer should try, should not try to reverse it. Praise the Lord. And the man who was uncircumcised when he became a believer should not be circumcised now. Praise the Lord. For it makes no difference whether or not a man has been circumcised. The important thing is to keep God's commands. Now, that helps explain what happens before happened before. According to some of the different history and different things, when people would get saved, they would go, well, now I'm saved. Now my spouse isn't saved. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna leave them and I'm gonna go and get married. There's also a way for them to try to get out of an unhappy marriage. Well, I'm saved now. They're not, so I'm gonna go. And he said, No, no, no, don't do that. If you leave them and then they go get married somewhere else, well, you gotta stay single now because you didn't mess that thing up. So instead, don't do that. Stay married with them. How do you not know that you being married and following Christ might be an example to them, might be an example to your kids. So if you can do that, stay married. Now, obviously, Paul's not talking about a situation where you're being beat up or whatever. He's saying in the situation where one of y'all is saved, one of y'all isn't, you're not allowed to just go leave. You have to try to stay. Now, if they leave you, then fine, but you have to try to stay. That's what Paul's trying to say. Whatever state you were in when you got, uh gave your life to Christ, that's the state you should try to remain in. All right, verse 20. Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you. Are you a slave? Don't let that worry you. But if you get a chance to be free, take it. And remember, if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord. And if you were free when the Lord called you, and now you're a slave in Christ, God paid for you with a high price. So don't be enslaved by the world. Each of you, dear brothers and sisters, should remain as you were when God first called you. Now, regarding your question about the young women who are not yet married, I do not have a command for you from the Lord for them, but the Lord will in his mercy has given me wisdom that can be trusted. So I will share it with you. Because of the present crisis, I think it is best to remain as you are. If you have a wife, do not seek to end the marriage. If you do not have a wife, do not seek to get married. But if you do uh get married, this is not a sin. And if your woman gets married, it is not a sin. However, those who get married at this time have troubles, and I am trying to spare you those problems. Pause. Now there's two things going on in this situation. You have number one, that they were in such a readiness for the second coming of Christ that they were concerned about getting married as if somehow that would kind of mess that up. And what Paul is saying is, you're right, we should always live in a readiness for the second coming of Christ. However, if you want to get married, go ahead. And then also you have the increasing pressure of being a Christian in the community. And he's saying, yes, we're starting to experience more uh pressure and more um suffering and things like that. So if you don't want to get married, that's great. If you do, go ahead and get married. In other words, what Paul is saying is occupy until Christ comes. That's still a good lesson for people today. We should be in readiness for the coming of Christ, but always live as though he's not going to come in our lifetime because we really don't know. And so we live with one eye on the sky. Verse 29. But let me say this, dear brothers and sisters, the time that remains is very short. So from now on, those with wives should not focus only on their marriage. Those who weep or who rejoice or who buy things should not be absorbed by their weeping or their joy or their possessions. But use those things as the world should, so the world should not become attached to them. Those who use the things of the world should not become attached to them. For this world as we know it will soon pass away. That was the readiness that they live with of knowing that God is more important than all these things. All right, verse 32. I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the things of the Lord and then thinking about how to please him. But a married man has to think about the things of his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. And in the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has been married or has never been married can devote herself to the Lord and wholly in her body and in spirit. But a man or a woman, um, but a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. I'm saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best with as few distractions as possible. But if a man thinks that he is treating his fiance uh irresponsibly improperly, it will inevitably give in to his passions, let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. But if he has decided firmly not to marry, and there is no urgency, and that he can control his passions, then he does well not to marry as well. So the person who marries his fiancee does well, and the person who does not marry does even better. A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. But my opinion on it would be it'd be better for her to stay single, and I think I'm giving you wise counsel, giving you counsel from God's Spirit when I say this. So there's a lot going on in this, and the basic idea, all the way back to this, is to get God involved with the important, most important relationship you're gonna have outside of your relationship with God. God is the number one most important relationship you're ever gonna have. Then you have to bring God into that relationship. If you do that, you have to make sure that you keep God as the central focus. If you keep God as the central focus, then you're going to be able to do well. When it comes to their sexual relations question, if you're helping one another to stay pure before God because your focus is on God, then you're doing well. If you're single and your focus is on God and you are okay with being single, then be single. That's what Paul's saying. But then if you can't control yourself or you have a desire to have a family, have that stuff, then because of your desire for God, get married. It's just that everything you do, make sure that your focus is on God. And one of the things I've told people before, and I've learned this in my own life, you want to have a great spouse, you encourage them to put God at the very center of their life. Because as they follow God, God will then cause them to love you more. And if you are in a situation where you're dating someone, make God that first priority. And God will either lead them toward you or lead them away from you. And that's the best thing for you. But when you get into this relationship dynamic, when you make God the center, he'll always lead you in the right direction. There's a lot of nuances to this. And so I'm encouraging you to dig deeper in this. And then let's talk about it on the Bible breakdown discussion because there's so many things in here, and there's there's scriptures here where Paul is talking about specifics that then we've taken and we've created bondage with this. And you notice how Paul over and over again is he's saying, I'm not saying these things to restrict you, I'm saying these things to help you and to give you life. So I want us to continue that discussion there. But for now, let's pray. Father, thank you so much for your goodness, your kindness, your faithfulness. Thank you, God, that in the relationship of marriage, there's so many nuances, so many pieces, and we all bring different things. But Lord, my hope is that as we make you the center of this relationship, Lord, you'll help us find that center. Help us find that balance. God, I pray for everybody right now who's not married but wants to be. Lord, that you'll give them the patience to trust you. Lord, for those who are married but don't want to be, I pray you will help them, Lord, to not not ever give up and to make you the focus of their relationship. I'm thankful that you're going to speak to us the way we need to hear you speak. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Well, family session, therapy session over for today for the Corinthian church. And in 1 Corinthians 1031, it tells us what to do. And that is, whatever you do, eating or drinking, do all for the glory of God. I love you. I'll see you tomorrow for 1 Corinthians chapter 8.